Happy Monday!

Friday I was driving home and saw a sign outside a church. It said 'A trial may be God's good gift in disguise.' Or something along those lines...
I used to believe in that. I used to tell myself that if I got a ticket, maybe I would have got into an accident later on and maybe it was truly a blessing. It is hard to think that about losing a baby.

I do believe in God and I know He has a plan for me. But it is hard to imagine that I am being put through a trial. I guess I can't imagine my God doing that or punishing people. I guess it does test your faith. If I didn't have my faith, I think things would be HARDER right now. (as if things aren't bad already). I really have good days and bad days. Time does help, but I'm not sure I believe anymore that 'time heals all wounds'. Some wounds are too deep. They may heal, but the scar is there forever and you have a daily reminder of what happened.

My sister has decided to schedule her son's baptism around the time that I would have been due. That seems insensitive to me, but my sister probably wasn't thinking. She is very self centered. She went through IF, but she isn't sensitive to IF issues. She has 3 kids now. It is amazing to me that she is SO insensitive towards IF. It took her several years to get pg with her first - 5 or 6 yrs.

IF is so hard that most of my friends are DONE having kids - most have 2 or 3. 3!!!!

Things are good - I'm working too much - worked several hours yesterday. My DH and I can't agree on a date for vacation. When I can go, he has to work and vice versa. Ugh!!!! So we may have to settle for a mini vacation around our area. I would go in June, but I think I'll be starting stims by then.

We had a great weekend at the festival - such a nice break. We went w/my mom and we walked around and had some adult beverages. It was a very relaxing weekend, but I'm so tired. My arms hurt from holding my nephew. If it wasn't for me, he would be in the stroller all day on SAT. My sister was busy working and her DH can't pick up the baby too much. Poor baby! He smiles when he sees me because he knows that I'll hold him and get him out of his stroller. He is such a cute baby. I got pg right when he was born, so he is a reminder on how far along I would be. :(

I have a big presentation this week at work. I'm kinda nervous, but hope it comes together.